


Rescuing (myself)

by myemergence



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Post-Tsunami (9-1-1)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-22
Updated: 2020-02-22
Packaged: 2021-02-28 09:55:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,828
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22848274
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/myemergence/pseuds/myemergence
Summary: “So what superpower would you pick?” Hen asked Buck, popping a chip into her mouth, legs stretched out in front of her, enjoying the calm of the river in front of them.“I think I’d want to fly,” Buck said after thinking for a moment.“So you can fly over the water and not be scared of it anymore.” Buck felt his eyes widen, quickly turning his head to look at Christopher. Had he really been so obvious?**Or the one where a golden retriever forces Buck to save himself.Based off a prompt from a chat in the buddie discord, where Buck saves a golden retriever from drowning.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley & Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Henrietta "Hen" Wilson/Karen Wilson
Comments: 5
Kudos: 253
Collections: 9-1-1 Tales





	Rescuing (myself)

**Author's Note:**

> Some canon divergence here, no lawsuit - takes place post-tsunami. Thank you to meloingly on the buddie discord for the beta, you are appreciated!

Buck hadn’t returned to the pier since the tsunami. He had done what he could to push the memories to the back of his mind, but felt them seeping through the cracks occasionally. That, however, wasn’t an effective way to help him work past it. Even though the department couldn’t force him into therapy because he’d been off duty when the tsunami had hit, Buck had started seeing a therapist, at Bobby’s request.

He had taken baby steps in the early days after the tsunami and before he returned to work. Getting to spend his time with Christopher had been an added bonus. Although he began to doubt it would ever happen, and he had been trying to figure out who he was without being a firefighter, he was finally cleared to return to the one-eighteen.

He learned to take things one day at a time, and he was finding a way to not live his life in fear, instead of waiting for the next disaster. Buck had the day off, so when Eddie asked if Buck wanted to spend the day with Christopher, Buck gladly took the opportunity to spend time with his favorite kid. When Buck had arrived at Eddie’s that morning, he told Buck that Chris had a playdate scheduled with Denny.

“You ready to hit the road, bud?” Buck asked over his shoulder, zipping up Christopher’s bag.

“I can’t wait to see Denny,” Christopher responded excitedly, his crutches clicking over the floor. “The last time that they came over, I showed him all of my dinosaurs.”

“Is that so?” The grin that lit up Christopher’s face was infectious, and a smile brightened Buck’s features. Buck and Christopher loaded up in the jeep before Buck pulled out his phone, typing the address in his GPS.

A short drive later, the pair pulled into a small parking lot that was settled adjacent to a playground, nestled along the river. A throaty laugh surfaced then as he shook his head. “What a coincidence,” Buck helped Christopher out of the booster seat in the back of his jeep, and the boy happily walked over to where Denny was playing.

“Hen,” Buck hugged her in greeting, a soft smile crossing his lips. He stepped out of their embrace, and crossed his arms over his chest as he looked for Christopher. “I should go see if he needs any help.”

“Let him be,” Hen suggested, with an eyebrow raised, clearly she had experienced her share of worry as a parent and had learned to reign that worry in. Denny had moved from the monkey bars and moved to the sandbox that was littered with dump trucks and other construction vehicles, where Christopher had joined him. “He’ll let you know if he needs you.”

Buck felt the familiar tug in his chest. Although it wasn’t something he had talked about, but whenever he had Chris, there was a thick shell of worry that surrounded him and he’d been unable to break through it. The moment he lost Christopher during the tsunami regularly plagued his mind, particularly late at night, the water slapping into him violently. Buck could feel himself going under, and struggling against the tide.

“So, the river, huh?” Buck hesitated. His gaze shifted from the playground where the boys were playing, and shifted to the river apprehensively.

“Yeah, _the river_ , is that a problem? I thought it would be nice to take a walk by the river after the boys are done playing.”

Buck’s eyes lingered on the river for longer than necessary, shifting his foot against the grass below, arms tight against his chest. “No, it’s fine, Hen. I just thought you usually took Denny to the park in your neighborhood.”

“We do, but when we meet up with Eddie and Chris, we like to come here. It’s more inclusive, there are more things that Chris is able to do,” Hen explained. Buck’s face softened and he felt his arms fall from where they were tightly pressed against his chest. 

“I didn’t even know this place existed,” Buck admitted. With as much time as Buck spent doing Google research, he was sure that he could find more places to take Christopher for activities that were more accommodating. “But of course you did.”

“Chris manages just fine,” Hen looked at Buck closely. “How are _you_ doing?” 

Buck pursed his lips together, letting out a quiet sigh. “I’m fine, Hen. You don’t have to worry,” He promised, glancing over at the boys. He studied how carefree they were, how full of life Christopher was despite all that he’d been through in the last six months. Buck envied his strength, his heart, and his resilience. Buck wished for those same qualities. 

“I’m a mom, Buck, it’s my job to worry,” Hen told him quietly. “You’ve just been different since the tsunami. I miss that puppy dog running around the firehouse.” Her lips ticked upward into a smile. He had always been loud with an exuberant energy that usually drove them all crazy. But in the last couple of months, he was a more reserved Buck. And while the change was expected with all he’d been through, Hen missed the carefree little brother that she found at the one-eighteen.

“I’m working through things,” Buck promised, shielding the sun from his eyes as he turned to look at Hen. “Bobby and I had a heart to heart the other day. He admitted that he was the one that had reservations about me returning, and that’s why I wasn’t able to return sooner. He didn’t think that I was ready.” 

“Oh, and how did that go?”

Buck sat down on a bench that faced the boys, Hen taking a seat beside him. “Honestly? It started off really shitty. I mean, I appreciated him being honest with me about it, so I could at least direct my anger at the right person.”

“He’s been in a really tough place, Buckaroo. He has to look out for everyone in the firehouse,” Hen paused, shifting on the bench so that she was facing Buck. “But more importantly, he looks at you as part of their family, and almost losing you under the fire rig, and then almost losing you in the tsunami… it was a lot for him to process.”

“I know that, and I respect that, I do. I can _almost_ understand it.”

“But you don’t think that you do?” She asked.

“I get that he cares about me and that he wants to keep me safe. But I’m not his to keep safe.”

“And what about Chris? Is he yours to keep safe?” She countered carefully. Buck’s mouth opened and then closed, searching for the words to say as he continued to keep watch on his best friend’s boy. “Don’t you think that you’ve been more protective of him since the tsunami?”

“He’s been through a lot,” Buck told her defensively.

“Exactly.” 

“Hen, how is letting his fear get in the way of me moving on going to help anything?”

A significant look crossed Hen’s face, squinting as the sun beat down on them. She noticed Buck doing another sweep of the park with his eyes, continuing to keep a close eye on the kids. Buck’s focus shifted back when Hen began to speak. “I know that it might not be logical, but he was trying to protect you, Buck. Have you asked yourself the same thing?”

Buck’s eyebrows knit together, leaning forward. He propped his elbows on his knees, turning back to Hen with a confused gaze, his hands dropping down in front of him. “What?”

“How is letting fear get in your way going to help you move on?”

“I-I don’t understand.”

“When is the last time that you went down to the pier?” She asked gently. “When is the last time that you went to the beach, or to the river, or that you went for a swim? When is the last time that you went anywhere with Chris without an overwhelming fear of what could happen?”

“I’m not sure what that has to do with anything,” Buck told her, his jaw visibly clenching.

“You have been so focused on getting back into tip-top shape, on what you’re able to do physically. I just want to be sure you’re taking care of yourself up here, too.” Her voice was gentle as she tapped her temples. 

“Hen.”

Hen put her hands up in the air, indicating that she would drop it. “Just something to think about, Buck, that’s all.” She assured him, sliding an arm around him and giving him a small squeeze. 

“Mom! I’m hungry,” Denny called loudly as he ran over to Hen and Buck. “Can we eat?”

“Of course we can,” Hen assured him, before grabbing the simple picnic that she had packed. Chris joined then at the bench only a minute later.

“Buck, Denny said they brought sandwiches shaped like dinosaurs,” Chris told him in awe. 

Buck let out a laugh, moving his hand to rest gently on Christopher’s shoulder. “Now this I have to see to believe.”

**

They had spent the better part of thirty minutes enjoying dinosaur-shaped sandwiches, grapes and chips. The conversation centered around the kids talking about who their favorite superheroes were, what superpower they would choose if they could only have one, and quickly digressed into the boy’s talking about Pokemon cards and Beyblades. 

“So what superpower would you pick?” Hen asked Buck, popping a chip into her mouth, legs stretched out in front of her, enjoying the calm of the river in front of them.

“I think I’d want to fly,” Buck said after thinking for a moment.

“So you can fly over the water and not be scared of it anymore.” Buck felt his eyes widen, quickly turning his head to look at Christopher. Had he really been so obvious? “I-I’m not scared of the water, Chris.”

“It’s okay to be scared,” Denny shrugged, opening his snack-sized bag of chips. “I’m still scared of the dark, sometimes, and Mom turns on my nightlight.”

Buck opened his mouth, as though ready to continue with the argument that he wasn’t scared of the water. Hen gently squeezed his shoulder, “just let it be, Buckaroo.”

“Do you guys hear that?” Buck’s forehead creased, hearing a soft whimper. Hen leaned forward, glancing towards the noise at the river in front of them before they heard a quiet bark.

“Buck! It’s a puppy!” Christopher’s face instantly reflected fear, as the boys realized the puppy was in the water, struggling to stay above the surface.

Buck rose to his feet quickly but felt himself stop abruptly, his mind overtaking his body’s automatic instinct. In a wave, he was brought back to the day of the tsunami, eyes blurry as he dove beneath the surface of the water searching for Christopher frantically. He propelled past the surface of the water, his eyes burning. He couldn’t find him anywhere. Eddie was going to _kill_ him. _Christopher_ . _Christopher_. 

He felt his shallow breath quicken as the memory slammed into him full force.

“Bucky! You have to save him just like you saved me! _Please_!” Christopher’s frantic voice brought him back to reality.

 _Breathe, Buck, breathe_. It took only a split second for Buck to snap back to reality, Christopher’s words breaking through the chaos in his mind. The boy’s shaking voice ripped through Buck’s core, and acting on instinct alone, he jumped into the river despite his rapidly racing heart. He dipped beneath the surface, searching for the drowning puppy and bringing him above the water. He secured the dog against his chest, shuddering out a few panicked breaths before he felt the feeling fade away.

Finally he felt like he could let out a breath, for the first time since the tsunami. “It’s okay, you’re going to be okay,” Buck soothed the whimpering pup, finding his fingers rubbing against the top of the puppy’s head to reassure him.

“You _saved_ him,” Christopher told him in awe. Buck felt a laugh bubble past his lips then, fingers gently rubbing against the drenched fur atop the puppy’s head.

Buck handed the puppy to Hen, who gave the golden retriever a thorough once-over. Aside from the fact that he was as dripping wet as his rescuer, he was acting perfectly fine with excited licks to the face. “Here, take him since you’re already soaked,” She laughed, handing the puppy back to Buck once he’d pulled himself out of the water.

“How can you not love this face?” Hen smirked as she looked from Buck to the golden retriever, and then back again. She distinctly remembered the first time that she compared Buck to a golden retriever. And as she stood there looking at the dripping wet duo, she decided that she loves both of their faces equally.

Christopher and Denny move to where Buck is holding the squirming puppy, who is twisting excitedly at the new found attention. “Do you think my dad will let me keep him?”

Hen pursed her lips together to try to fend off the smile. “I think your dad might let you keep _both_ of them.” 

**

“Dad! You’re home!” Christopher called excitedly before the door had fully closed behind Eddie. He had just arrived home after his shift, thankful that Buck had volunteered to watch Christopher so that he was able to pick up some extra hours. 

“Hey bud, I don’t remember the last time you were so excited for me to get home.” Eddie eyed him with suspicion from where he sat on the couch. “Should I be worried?” He glanced around. “Where’s Buck?”

“In the kitchen,” Christopher told him in a hurry. 

Eddie gave Christopher another sideways glance. “Buck, I’m home!” Eddie called, as Buck made his way into the living room where the Diaz boys were.

“Sorry, man, just finished making dinner.” Eddie looked from Buck to Chris, his eyes shifting between the two of them and settling on Buck’s crooked grin.

“What are you two up to?”

“Let’s go have dinner,” Buck shrugged, avoiding the question as he heard the familiar click behind them, Chris following them into the dining area.

Eddie stood in the doorway with his arms crossed over his chest. “What are you two hiding?” He asked cautiously watching Buck get Christopher settled at the table, before Buck began serving plates of chicken caesar salad. 

“Are you going to eat and ask us about our day, or spend your time coming up with conspiracy theories?” Buck laughed, holding a plate out to him. Eddie took the plate hesitantly before joining the two of them at the table.

“Alright, alright. Tell me about your day. How was the park with Denny?”

“It was so fun! We played on the swings, played with the excavators in the sandbox, and then we had lunch and Buck-” Christophed stopped himself abruptly, clamping his mouth shut.

“And Buck, what?” Eddie raised his brow, glancing at Buck who remained silent, taking a bite of his salad.

“Buck was brave. He saved a puppy from drowning in the river, even though he was scared.”

“You saved a puppy from the river?” Eddie’s gaze was soft, studying Buck’s. He had tried taking Buck down to the pier a few times, and then for open swim with Christopher and Buck had always found a reason to not be available, whenever a body of water had been involved.

“He didn’t need too much in the way of saving,” Buck’s tone was quiet as he shrugged his shoulders, not wanting overcoming his fears to become the focal point of their dinner conversation. A whimper closely followed by a bark came from the laundry room causing Buck and Chris to exchange a quick look.

“Was that… a dog?” Eddie asked slowly, the suspicious glance returning to his face. 

“No, that was _Evan_ ,” Christopher corrected his dad. After Hen had told him that Eddie might let them keep Buck and the dog, he’d decided to name it after Buck.

“ _Buck_.”

Buck pursed his lips together anxiously. “Am I not allowed to watch Chris anymore?” Buck asked, as concern clouded his expression.

Eddie chuckled at the question. “No, you can still watch him - but we can’t keep a dog here. Chris, I don’t have the time to take care of it all by myself, and this puppy is going to get really, really big.”

“But Aunt Hen promised that we could keep them both.”

“ _Both_? Is there another dog?” Eddie asked incredulously.

“No, silly.” Christopher couldn’t control the giggles. “Just Evan, _and_ Buck. Aunt Hen said we can keep them both.” 

With a deep sigh, Eddie looked at his two favorite boys, Christopher giggled as the puppy attempted to climb up Buck’s legs, begging for attention. It was clear that he was never letting Buck go. Once again, Eddie had lost another argument, and the happiness that it brought to them made Eddie’s heart soar.


End file.
